Survivors Journey’s – Brave Stacey Coles, from Rotherham, reported sick David Dayman to police and is now campaigning to help other rape survivors

LIVING A NIGHTMARE Mum relives harrowing afternoon her friend’s fiancé violently raped her on his birthday… and her mate stood by Him. 

A BRAVE mum has spoken of the harrowing afternoon her best mate’s fiancé raped her in her living room on his birthday.

Stacey Coles, from Rotherham, told how vile David Dayman, 43, forced himself on her while returning a top his partner had borrowed.

The 31-year-old reported him to police – but her friend decided to stand by her man.

Despite Dayman’s claims that the sex was consensual, a jury found him guilty and he was jailed for eight years.

Now Stacey has waived her right to anonymity and is sharing her story to help other rape survivors who are struggling and in need of advice and support.

Stacey recalled how she had encouraged her friend Kirsty* to start dating Dayman after she’d split from her husband.

“He’d been pursuing her for a while and I’d spent weeks telling her to give him a chance,” she said.

The pair soon began seeing each other and Stacey and her partner John would often join them on double dates.

Stacey also got to know Dayman’s daughter Sarah*, while him and John would bond over their shared love of motorbikes.

Sick David Dayman tried to claim that the sex was ‘consensual’, but the jury saw through his lies. 

On December 27, 2015 – Dayman’s birthday – Stacey texted Kirsty to ask if she would return a top she’d lent her.

She explained: “Kirsty replied saying she was at work, suggesting she tried Dave.

“I was messaging his daughter at the same time so I suggested that when her dad brought back my top, she could come and stay over so we could have a catch up.

“But a few hours later Sarah texted to say Dave wasn’t coming. I didn’t think too much of it, assuming Kirsty would drop my top off in the next few days.”

But that afternoon, while Stacey was watching TV after John had left for work, Dayman knocked at her door.

She told how she invited him in for a coffee and listened as he told her about the issues he’d been having with Kirsty.

Stacey told how she had encouraged her friend to enter into a relationship with Dayman. 

When Stacey took their cups into the kitchen, Dayman pounced, putting his hands on her waist and leaning in to kiss her.

She recalled: “I immediately pushed him off and asked what he was doing.

“Dave then grabbed the coffee cup from my hand and threw it on the floor.

“I marched into the living room and picked up his coat, telling him to leave.

“But Dave launched at me from behind. Terrified, I desperately tried to fight him off, but he was stronger than me.

“He viciously pulled at my jeans. Somehow I twisted round to face him. He was almost smirking as he ripped open my top and started grabbing my breasts.

“I pleaded with him to stop, shouting no, but he wasn’t deterred.

“He pushed me so hard I fell onto the sofa, knocking my coffee table flying.

Stacey had invited Dayman into her home for coffee when he attacked her in the kitchen. 

“He picked up a cushion and put it over my face, telling me if I screamed he’d smother me. All I could do was cry as Dave raped me.”

Afterwards Stacey told how Dayman calmly stood up and answered a call from Kirsty as he strolled out of her flat.

Hysterical, she called her neighbour who immediately came to her aid, before dialling 999.

After speaking with the police she called John, who held her as she sobbed.

“Even though I hadn’t done anything wrong, I felt as though I had betrayed him,” Stacey confessed.

Stacey was taken to a specialist centre for rape victims where she was examined.

After the attack, Stacey told how Dayman got up and answered a call from his partner. 

She said: “Afterwards, when I was allowed to have a shower, I scrubbed myself until I was red raw, desperate to get every trace of Dave off me.

“I desperately tried to pull myself together, but I struggled to cope. I couldn’t leave the flat without John.

“Although Dave had been arrested, he had been released on bail and I was terrified that he would come after me again.

“I barely slept or ate, and when the girls came home, I simply functioned – knowing I had to try and stay strong for their sake.”

To make matters worse, Stacey said Kirsty and Sarah both sent her messages stating they were standing by Dayman.

She admitted: “I didn’t have the strength to argue.”

In the aftermath of the attack, Stacey struggled to cope with the vivid memories of Dayman raping her.

Unable to stay in the same flat or town, and scared about seeing Dayman while he was out on bail, Stacey moved miles away to start afresh.

But she was still haunted by images of Dayman raping her and was prescribed a course of anti-depressants.

Stacey joined a Facebook group for rape victims and eventually felt strong enough to write her own blog, which she said felt like “therapy”.

In January this year Dayman appeared at Leicester Crown Court and pleaded not guilty to rape, claiming Stacey had willingly had sex with him.

But the jury saw through his lies and he was sentenced to eight years and placed on an indefinite restraining order, banning him from contacting Stacey.

He was also placed on the sex offenders register for life.

“I still feel sick to the core when I think about what Dave did to me,” said Stacey.

Stacey told how she moved away from the area after Dayman attacked her as she was terrified about seeing him while he was out on bail. 

“He was supposed to be a friend but violated me in the worst possible way.

“But I refuse to let him destroy my life. I’m now helping other rape survivors – I’m determined that some good can come out of this whole horrific event.”

*Kirsty and Sarah are fake names.

Stacey has continued on bravely and offers her support to many who are fighting to survive,  here is the link where she admins for a Facebook group to raise awareness and support for victims of rape crimes. Please feel free to join…  

Pheonix Wings Cause.


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